Zeeky H-Bomb

Zeeky "One-Piece" H-Bomb

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(Description)

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Zeeky's face is rugged and worn, obviously middle-aged for a Goblin from his swept-back (balding) graying hair and laugh lines. His leer is hidden behind a tough-guy scowl that holds up the thick cigars he's always smoking. When he does grin, usually in the thick of combat, he does so as maniacally as any neigh-suicidal sapper - lighting explosives with his cigar as he cackles in a dance of pyrotechnics and flying bullets. His eyes are always hidden behind goggles of one sort or another, as the years are starting to catch up to him slightly. Most often he wears a pair of gleaming ruby marksman shades. Two weird devices are tucked in his ears and look like machine earrings of some sort, but they are actually Voice Amplification Modules - from all of those years as a sapper, he still sometimes has trouble hearing without them. Zeeky smells strongly of rare Tobacco, Gunpowder, Oil, and Goblin Rocket fuel - a combination strong, pungent, and compelling. Rare for a Goblin, he refuses to wear any sort of Cologne - considering it a bourgeoisie thing for Elves, Humans, and Nub Gobs.

Short, even for a Goblin, Zeeky is only barely larger than a Gnome - even if you count the black baret hats he prefers to wear. He's very lithe and limber, with a size and build that affords him great agility and speed. This has been the secret of his survival as a sapper, along with his quick reflexes. Covered head to toe in various burn scars and singe marks, to the point where his dark-green skin seems perpetually blackened in spots, the Goblin is noticeably strong. He hefts a firearm onto his shoulder with a stoic attitude and ease that defies his tiny stature. Zeeky clearly does not fear much and carries himself with the dignity of a Tauren twenty times his size. Most of the time he wears dark, thick leather covered dull metal plates and in all sorts of pouches. Zeeky has an intense stare even from behind his goggles. A twin bandoleer of tell-tale red sticks and gleaming bullet rounds crosses behind his back. His belt is rigged with a variety of rocket-like devices. A variety of dull-metal spheres, devices, and satchels dangle from it. Sometimes, especially in business matters, he dresses up - wearing a nice white Suit Jacket with black slacks; the combination very striking with how dark his skin is.

He's always followed by his well groomed, loyal black Warsong Worg, 'Doog'. Doog is an older worg, very well behaved and unusually intelligent - capable of understanding several languages. He protects Zeeky faithfully, and often, Doog carries him around on his back for swift travel. Zeeky is also accompanied by his loudmouthed robot assistant, GUR (which stands for 'Goblin Utility Robot'), who is very strange and glitchy. The GUR is capable of transforming into a variety of forms. The standard GUR is a Tool/Lunch Box, a Tiny Car, or a knee-high Bipedal Robot. Zeeky's GUR actually seems to prefer mechanical animal forms, such as a Squirrel, Chicken, or even sometimes a Rabbit. It is rumored that his GUR, after being damaged in the Lost Isles Incident, has developed a kind of artificial intelligence - but it's so random and quirky that it could hardly be defined as 'intelligence'

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(Personality)

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If there's one word that describes Zeek's personality as a Goblin, it is the word CONTRARY There's something slightly off about Zeek to most Goblins.

Where most Gobs come across as 'greedy' by most outsider standards, Zeeky, to the contrary, seems shockingly generous - and as such, looked at with a combination of sympathy, laughter, and suspicion by his fellows. If he's not 'pitied for his lack of business sense' in giving things out for free', or viewed with outright suspicion ('What IS that Gob playing at doing things like that?') he's at least appreciated by most of his kind for sharing his gains amongst his people. Except the Trade Princes themselves or their rich patsies. Zeeky often does things for 'free' - from fireworks displays for urchins in the gutter to sharing food or drinks that'd normally be expensive with the poor. There are plenty of reasons why Zeek is like that given his background, and the rewards of his generosity more often than not prove more profitable overall than a couple coins up front.

Contrary to most thinking, he still has a decent enough head for business (that most Gobs overlook when he seems like he's practically giving things away for no obvious gain, and using that underestimation to his advantage). He's just a wise planner for the long term, and invests in people rather than just gold or goods. It is not surprising that Zeek also has a strong love of gambling. Again, contrary to the usual, where one would expect a cackling sapper to have limited intelligence or wisdom of any sort, Zeeky is an avid devourer of books and is if anything, incredibly intelligent and insightful. A quick learner, quick to adapt, he adores learning (and sharing) about anything and everything. He was barely a nub when he first learned Orcish, pretty much an alien language at the time, when half the other nubs in the street could barely speak Goblish strait - and was also learning smatterings of Zandali, as well as any Alliance languages he could steal books for. His days not spent blowing up things or tinkering around with ways to blow up things were spent reading, writing, studying local culture, and making useful inventions for later. Like adapting a metal grenade canister into an airtight beverage container - which the Kaja'Cola company bought right up.

Contrary to his diminutive size, his attitude is stoic, chin up, and defiant - especially against abused authority, even in situations Gobs many times his size back down. Zeek has always been resentful of the Trade Princes excesses, for example, and despises any leader that doesn't have the balls to get down into the good fight beside their people. It is partially due to this attitude that when he returned from the Second War he didn't last long in Undermine, having to literally defect to the Bilgewater and it's Cartel (although there were other circumstances involved that had every reason to provoke him). Even there, his friction with Trade Prince Gallywix was just another undercurrent in otherwise troubled times.

Zeeky's major flaws are his volatile anger and his bipolarity.

If he feels sleighted in any way, as most Goblins usually do, Zeeky blows up. Sometimes, however, that's more literal than figurative. Bullies draw his ire hugely, especially if they're using cronies to do the work for them. He's also got the Azerothian equivalent of post-traumatic stress disorder; shell-shock. Under certain conditions, particularly a few hostile stressors, Zeek can snap. He can go from friendly grin to becoming a cold-blooded killing machine with explosives and bullets - turning off everything but his instincts and immediate wits. In that state, while he's usually (usually...) able to differentiate between friend and foe, he's not very merciful. It's a survival mechanism, where all there was between a gruesome death and warm bed next to a campfire was seconds. It was this condition that earned him a lot of respect in the Warsong Clan during the Second War.

Now, of course, it can be a drawback. When 'triggered' he becomes short with his friends and fellows - often enough forcing him to withdraw and isolate himself to prevent 'friendly fire'. The loss of his family, the only people who really 'understood' him other than the Warsong, has also been very taxing emotionally and mentally. His inner fuse is much shorter at times, though he strives to avoid letting it get the better of him.

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(Background)

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Born to a poorer family on the streets of Undermine, Zeeky's early life was spent eeking out a living competing with his twenty or so brothers and sisters there. The literal runt of his family, quick witted Zeeky found a niche infiltrating high risk places dodging barrel traps (Shuckers) in warehouses or vaults, returning with valuable food and trinkets stolen from richer Goblins for his own family. Several other brothers and sisters of his were not so fortunate, quick, or cunning as little Zeek - many died, making him no stranger to loss from a young age.

When the Steamwheedle Cartel was approached by the Horde in the early days of the Second War, Zeeky decided to sign on with the third gaggle of Sapper Teams scooped up from the streets in hopes of finding a shortcut to fortune and glory using his size, cunning, and talents. Amazingly (statistically speaking for a Goblin Sapper) he found it, having successfully survived over a thousand target bombing runs throughout the Eastern Kingdoms with all of his arms, legs, and body parts intact, rapidly earning him the nickname 'One-Piece'.

When the Second War officially ended, Zeeky still found himself cut off from access to the sea by hostile Alliance forces along with several other Goblins. Together, they took refuge among the Warsong Clan of Orcs, led by Grom Hellscream at the time, who prized Goblin ingenuity and tactics. Zeek and the other Goblins still working with the Horde often caused explosive diversions to cover Warsong escapes. For his services, he was gifted by the Warsong with a runty black worg pup he affectionately named 'Doog' - a warm natured joke that proved just as tenacious and cunning as the tiny Goblin himself. With the Warsong Clan, he evaded the Alliance forces, generally waging a futile guerrilla war until just before the onset of the Third War when the Warsong Clan was briefly captured. During that imprisonment, he was frequently singled out for torment by bullying Human captors, creating a lifelong hatred of Humanity for its cruelty 'for the Alliance'. When they were subsequently freed by Thrall, rather than go to Kalimdor with Thrall's Horde, Zeeky opted instead to return home to Kezan with Doog and several fellow ex-sappers and ex-zeppelin pilots. Thrall and Grom made sure they were well paid for their services and survival. Each Goblin that went home also was given a Medallion of the Horde for their service. Zeeky wore his proudly and has always considered the Horde, particularly the Warsong, very warmly - and they remember him as Khoh-Grrahn, 'Little One-Piece'.

With his saved years of pay, he returned only to find hostility in Undermine. The Steamwheedle Cartel, looking to emphasize their new stance of neutrality in the Horde/Alliance conflict, couldn't have war heroes like him and the others complicating their reputation. Rather than pay all of his savings in fees to help cover up things, he defected to the Bilgewater Cartel - getting him thoroughly disowned by his own Family. He ended up setting up shop in Bilgewater Port and joined up with their Cartel. There, he acted as an independent inventor specializing in creative explosives, and struck big when he sold his concept for 'Pop-Tab Canned Beverages' to the Cartel, which had already created the mega-popular carbonated drink 'Kaja'Cola'. The Pop-Tab Can design really worked well with it, making it portable and sealing in the bubbles. He quickly became a spokesman for the beverage, and came up with many catchy slogans that took well throughout Kezan. Otherwise, he continued to work as a SEED (Specialized Experimental Explosives Design) Engineer at his business, specializing in creative explosives such as 'Goblin Fishing Poles' and all sorts of Fireworks. About two years later, having enough money, he took a wife and started his own family - becoming a respected merchant-engineer of his community. Kaja'cola, with his Pop-Tab Can Design making him a ton of bling, continued to be THE boom-product throughout Kezan. Life was good for Zeeky H-Bomb.

Until the day of the Shattering. After a party at the KTC Headquarters in Bilgewater, Kajaro's rumbling and instability caused nothing but panic in Bilgewater as Deathwing pronounced his judgement on the Goblin People. Protecting his family and friends from rampaging Southsea Pirates and desperately searching for a way to save them from the impending destruction of the Goblin homeland, Zeeky did what most of his fellow Goblins did - he traded all of his assets and finances (and thensome) to Trade Prince Gallywix, who coincidentally owned several large yachts just perfect in size for evacuating Kezan. He traded everything in exchange for his family to be granted safe passage from the Island to a 'Safe Zone' at the nearby Isles. Successful at great cost, Zeeky's family, along with Doog, was taken aboard. Only barely did he himself escape Kezan with the other Goblin refugees on Gallywix's main Yacht - then to discover Gallywix's nefarious plan. Zeeky seethed from behind the bars with the rest of his people, for fear of what would become of his family. But he could not have imagined just how horrible that fate would become.

Near the Lost Isles, all Goblin ships were fired upon by warmongering Alliance ships. Zeeky watched with horror through the bars as the ship with his family on it was blasted to bits by Human Cannons - before having Gallywix's Yacht itself blown apart.

Found afloat in the wreckage by fellow survivors, suffering a massive concussion that's going to take a while to recover from, he's trapped now on the Lost Isles with the other refugees of Kezan. He's lost his family, his dog, his fortune, and almost everything he's worked for over the last thirty years. Now, Zeeky nurses a hateful wrath against the Alliance, Deathwing, and Gallywix that demands fiery vengeance, a sentiment shared by his former employers, the Horde, who even now offer their hand in the Goblin's moment of deepest need. Under Garrosh Hellscream, the Warsong Clan has been in ascendancy, and more than a few of the ol' Warsong boys remember Zeek with some respect. Using this influence, he established the 'KORE' (Kezan Offshore Reclaimation & Excavation) Enterprises, a business Union focusing in gathering together the many dispassioned and hopeless Goblin refugees. Zeeky believes that only by bringing his people together, working beside one another to seek profits via plunder, archaeology, and other means, they can build a new Kezan (or ever rebuild the old one) with those profits. A better future, together, unified. Many Goblins, such as Kaja'mere, Debt, and several others joined soon after - sharing in that belief and passion. Though Zeeky found Doog there on the shores of the Lost Isles, his family seems lost to the sea - and he strives to make his way in the ravaged world.

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(Main Information)

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In-Game Character Name: Zeekyhbomb

In-Game Title: ????? (Planning to go for 'Flame Keeper' Unless 'Sapper' or some other title becomes available)

Full RP Name: Zeeky "One-Piece" Hefty-Bomb

Nicknames: Ol' "OP" ; Zeek

Current Level: 62

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(Connections)

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Main Faction Affiliation(Horde or Alliance): Horde.

Other Faction Affiliations:

All Gob Cartels (we gottah keep united - our race depends on it!)

The Warsong Clan (got old friends there).

Otherwise, whoevah pays good and helps me down Blues.

Server: Twisting Nether

Guild/Rank: KORE Enterprises. Executive Founder of this Union for our refugees, devoted to building profit and to a new Kezan.

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(Aptitudes, & Professions)

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Main Two Professions/lvls: Mining/Engineering

Their Skill Ranks?: Grandmaster Both

Their Specs?: Goblin Engineering, Obviously

Other Profs?:Zeek is a jack of all trades, very good at First Aid, Fishing, Cooking, and of course, LOVES Archaeology

Main Talent Spec: Survival

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(Past & Future)

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Birthplace/Date: Bilgewater Harbor, about fifteen years before the Second War.

Family/Cartel: The Hefty-Bomb family, Steamwheedle Cartel.

Current 'Home': When not off on adventures, he resides with his fellow Goblins in Bilgewater Bay. He's on the move too much to really stay long, but he has friends there.

Usual RP Haunts: Bilgewater Port, Orgrimmar, Shimmering Flats Racebarge's Bar, Un'goro Crater hunting fossils

Main Goal in WoW: Unify the Goblin Race, build a new Homeland and better future. Kill enough Blues to make them beg for peace or else remove them entirely, to allow for it. Find the Origin of the Goblin Race and a new source of Kaja'mite.

Wants in WoW: Clockwerk Goblins, Rocket Mount that's easier to get, ALL Engy Trinkets made usable from the Bag or otherwise instead of requiring us to wear every damn thing.

PVP?: Blues need to get a lesson in manners, and chemistry. They'll keep comin'. I'll keep shootin'.

RP?: Always. No mattah what I'm dooin.

PVE?: Anytime else. There's threats out there just as bad as the 'blues.

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(Personality & Favorites)

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Character Inspirations/Role Model(s):

Che Guevara and Fidel Castro mixed with George Carlin's wit and wisdom, along with the violent snapping of Flippy from Happy Tree Friends. His appearance/accent resemble Arcturis Mengsk from Starcraft II, but his personality is nothing like that character.

Song that Describes Him: Blow Me Away by Breaking Benjamin (Read the Lyrics, trust me, it fits - Think of Goblin Sappers preparing to die for the old Horde. Sums up how Zeeky feels inside)

Hobbies: Philosophy (weird for a Goblin, eh?), Smoking. Fireworks. Killing Blues. Reading & Archaeology.

Things that annoy: Non-RPers (on an RP Server). Really Stupid Nubs. Humans. Vendor Food (My DOG eats better than this). The Huntarded.

Things that amuse: Fire. A good Book. Moving displays of Fireworks. Goblin Opera.

Likes: Rockets. Explosives. Fireworks. Big Guns. Good Cigars. Old Books. Ancient Artifacts. Well prepared foods.

Hates: Deathwing. The Human Race (Especially the SI:7). Trade Prince Gallywix.

Favorite Combat Pet: Doog, my faithful Black War Worg. Doog also helps me get aroun'.

Favorite Non-Combat Pet: GUR the "Goblin Utility Robot". It's mental core is very damaged it but can take many forms - Usually a Mechanical Squirrel. Functions also as a Lunch Box, Tool Box, Radio, etc.

Favorite Colors: Rusty Orange, Burnt Red, and Powder Black

Favorite Weapon Type: Firearms and Bombs. Sapper Charges especially.

Favorite Magic Type: ... Fire, I guess? I guess it doesn't count as magic to those stuffy Mage n' Lock types.

Favorite In-Game Food: Goblin Barbecue, Gumbo, and Snapvine Watermelon. Best meal I evah had was Dirge's kickin' Chimerok Chops.

Favorite In-Game Drink: Nothing beats plain ol' spring water. Simple n' good, an' you can put yourself out with it if you gottah.

Favorite In-Game Alcohol: 'Learned early on not to drink when you handle explosives, you go up fastah. When I do drink, rare when I do though, nothin' NOTHIN' beats Volatile Rum. Forgetahbboutit.

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(Vital Opinions)

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About the Horde:

Didn' count on working with the reds again, but can't argue with the times, 'n I'm glad to have them at my back. Some of those ol' axes from the Warsong still remember my tattered ol' mug. Eiththa they saved my ass or I saved theirs. It's comforting, a bunch. 'specially when they stick up for me to their bonehead boss. Blues are my target, and we've all got grudges to rack up. Minus it's current head hauncho, it's my kindah place.

-About Orcs: Orcs keep me paid, and they've nevah let me down. Nevah shorted me on pay, neither. It's a honor thing. Youngbloods get to big for their breeches, though, and think they're bigger than me. Pups need to learn a lesson 'n respect.

- About Thrall: Good Orc, 'spose. We have him to thank for having a place to hang our guns, but he's way too trustin' on the Blues for my tastes and for some reason let that rat Gallywix remain in charge. That's not sittin' well with me.

- About Garrosh Hellscream: If his pah was around, he'd be ashamed of this Outlander Whelp! I get that he's dooin' best he can, but he's a stranger to this world an' doesn't catch on this ain't his old homeland. He might make a good leader someday, but that aint' before a lot of innocent blood sacrificed to learn him. He hasn't earned my respect.

-About Blood Elves: I'm no big fan of Elves. Usually stuck up pansies, but it looks like the Third War knocked some kickass into them, and we're playing for the same side now. Well, I think. I've heard about what they do in the locker rooms. Least' they overlooked the fact I left no few smoking craters in the Eversong back'n the big one.

- About Lor'themar Theron: (Shrugs) Just another Elf. They all look alike to me. Doesn't look like he's got much clout in the Horde, 'n doesn't care neither. Whatevah.

-About Forsaken: Wear a gasmask around the stiffs. It can't hurt... besides, might help the smell some. I know a bomb when it's going to go off, and that's the stiffs. Pure n' simple.

- About Sylvannas: Chilly bitch, but she can snipe a bitchbird in stonetalon from crossroads without batt'n a dead eyelash. Watch your back around 'er, sure. She'd as soon kill us as kill the blues iffn' she got her way. However, I've helped her and hers out here an' there against the wolves in name of the Horde. She warms up a tad if you protect her peeps. She helped me learn how to adapt Black Arrow to Black Bullet in return, an' I'll be forever grateful for that. Otherwise, don' trust her.

-About Darkspear Trolls: Don' really care for 'em. Don't really hate 'em, either. They kill Blues too, so we get along alright. I've been 'round long enough to know they aren't all whooping monkeyfolk whot come from the trees 'n owe my hide to a couple Amani from back in the Big One. They aren't real sophisticated types, but they're not all primates eithaah.

- About Vol'jin: I met the guy, and he's proof Trolls aren't all head-shrinking monkey-spawn. Got a good head on his shoulders (a few of 'em, but let's not get technical), 'n wants to give his peeps a better lot in life. Can respect that. Still wouldn't follow him if he was Warchief, though. Nevah live it down. Echo Island's not a bad place. Kindah reminds me of home, a tad. Plenty of smoke, but no where near enough oil. Could use some Pink Flamingos.

-About Tauren: Cow people? I'd heard of 'em when I was on Kezan, sure, but hell, it's another thing SEEING 'em or fightin' beside them. Watch your step there, big guy - or you'll be looking for your hoof pieces with a damn telescope. Overall, if they aren't stepping on us, Tauren are my kindah people. They keep their deals 'bout as good as Orcs an' what they know about the balance a' nature the Elves' seem tah forgot long ago. Sometimes a welcome change from the down and dirty back in Orgrimmar or Bilgewater.

- About Cairn Bloodhoof: I've heard from others about his stories. Did 'em wrong. Waaay wrong. Just why we gottah watch that moron, Garrosh, before he goes and chops down the treehouse.

- About Cairn's Son, Baine: So that's who's leading them now. Hope he's tougher on the war-front than his pap. Also hope he's tough enough to smack some smarts into Garrosh. If that's even possible. Still haven't met the guy.

-About Other Goblins: We've got a lot to do, and the only way we're gonnah survive is to come together and wise up to changin' times. We're carving out a new home, new life, and new profit from the warzone we've just got dumped into, and to do that, we've gottah change ourselves. We're not going to roll over and be slaves, to Gallywix or otherwise. We aren't just tools of a warmachine (even if bonehead Garrosh thinks we are). TOGETHER, we'll carve out our place with steel n' powder, gold n' fire, and the uncrushable Goblin spirit!

- About Trade Prince Gallywix: That scum bag is on my permanent shit list. Thrall's got a plan for 'em, or else I'd be wearing his ragged hide like a cape and letting Doog chew his scummy bones. The time has come to rise up against Trade Prince oppression, and together we can lead the way for the future against such overwhelmingly greedy oppressors that defy the Golden mean.

- About Sassy Hardwrench: Dame's good as gold. Her talent was wasted on being just a secretary. Glad she's getting that promotion she's always been wanting - always told her it'd be the end of the world when she got her break. (laughs) Who'da thunk it?

- About "Her Tallest" Mida Silvertong: I was there that day to see what went down on those docks. Had it not been for her and her pap, so many of us would've been left to the flames. We owe her a debt greater than gold; a price outshined by her own heart. Give'er your best iffn' you see her, and be glad she's here for us. Her example inspired me to create KORE, y'know.

About the Alliance:

The Alliance. I can tell yah volumes. Fact is they don' want peace as bad as Garrosh don't. Alliance want to rule the world. Humans crave power more than any warlock or scheming demon, 'n they play the others like harps. There's a reason Deathwing chose a 'Human' form instead of Elven, like most others. They don' want peace, an' you can't trust a word they say. It's all pollitic'in and bullshit, committees and more red tape than a Blood Elf birthday party. The only way to have future peace is to break the Alliance's back and shut the Humans up. Permanently.

-About Humans: Humans, on the whole, are dishonorable cheats. Gobs respect gobs looking to make a' coppah. Business is Business. Humans, though - greedy. They don't want your money so much as they want power ovah you. World domination, and they've half got it. Don't trust a word they say, they just lie and scheme and take. And hurt. Without them, most of the other races would just go home and mind their p's n q's. Remembah that when you've got one of 'em in your crosshair. Only Human I met I actually liked was crazier than a gnome on fire, and no where near as bright. Still, fun runnin' around Un'goro with that 'knight'.

- About their King: I got one bullet just for the asshole who sicced the SI:7 on us, and continues to. One figure that keeps the war goin' on sheer reflex, just because he hates Garrosh. I kill that man, and the War will be over in no time. If that bullet doesn't hit, then it'll just be him, me, the bomb, and the plan. I'm not gettin' any youngah.

[u}- About Prince Anduin: [/u] I've heard of the boy. I heard his name among the cow-men spoken high. But even if they're right, he's still a Human. He talks pretty, but he's still young. There's too much politics around him to have control over his own actions - even if he thinks he might. Youth is idealistic. Youth, sad to say, is stupid. That said, I won't aim for him, but if he gets in my way, I'll give him fair as any other Human.

- About Jaina Proudmoore: I've heard a lot of her, and Kul'tiras has a long rep with our kind (sneers). I've heard she's not a shit like the rest of the Humans, but that's just Thrall talkin'. She's a Tirassan, they are true to their word as any Human folk I've ever known (bullheaded lot they are), n' while she's sacrificed in the name of peace - and I'll still hesitate my draw on her - I hope for her sake she doesn't get in my way. I do have ways of dealing with spellflingahs, and I won' trust her to move or speak behin' me.

-About Night Elves: If'nn there's anything I hate, it's stuckup Elves, and these're worse than the pales. They're just as full of shit as they're forest compost, and will break for the trees if the Humans drop. Only after they get their ego deflated is there a chance for peace. Maybe that'll happen, too. Until then, I'll remind 'em how Guns beat Bows any day of the week.

- About Tyrande Whisperwind: I heard about her. Chicks is still chicks. When ol' man stormrage comes back from his nap, she's going to be joined to his hip to make up for lost time. Guaranteed.

- About Malfurion Stormrage: Heard he's been gone lately but might be coming back. I don't know what to make of 'em. Seems to keep it neutral for now, but I don't think he's going to keep it that way. Big hunt could be on sooner than we think - especially if Cenarius comes for the Warsong, like the boys say. Ain't gonna let that happen.

-About Dwarves: The worst part is that Dwarves actually have balls AND brains, but are still in the pocket of the Humans! Have been since the Big One, an' what do they get for their trouble? To be lapdogs to them? Though they invented guns (I even carry one of their make, got it during the Second War - best Gun evah, after few modifications 'course), and rock'em in use, they get'n my way an' I'll show 'em how they were MEANT to be used!

- About King Magni: Heard he got too reckless and got stoned. Wonder what's up with that?

- About his Daughter: That must've been an awkward day for Daddy. Did he get stoned before or after she came back?

- About Brann Bronzebeard: Keep up the good work, but dammit, watch your step in those old ruins! I've known bombmakers that sleep better at night.

- About Muradin Bronzebeard: There's a third brother? Where the fel did he come from? And what's his fucking problem!

-About Gnomes: I never could understand 'em. Can't make a good detonator to save their hides, but can make gears that don't flake. Can't get a bomb to go off on time, but can time circuits to get a bot moving good. Yeah, the mechanical stuff is good when it works, but how often is that? 'Least our goods are still useful, even if they just blow up. Just gottah take that into consideration. Gnomes just don't make sense to me... they had every potential and invest it backwards. A race of nubs! It's no wonder the Humans take them for all they got.

- About Gelbin Mekkatorque: Thanks to you I have a crack at your city. Do you have any idea how many plans I got my hands on thanks to your fuckup so I can mod 'em into TRULY useful things? Keep up the work, nub!

-About Draenei: What ARE they? Where did they come from? And for fuck sake, why'd they join up with the blues? All that shiny, high-tech shit and they go and throw it all away by backing the Humans? I'll give 'em as much as they give me. No more, no less. They're probably just Gnomes with squid faces. If they'd landed near Kezan, I like to think it'd be differen' - though they're a mite too religious.

- About Prophet Velen: I think any so-called 'prophet' is full of smoke. WE decide our fates, even if the plans, schemes, and movements in the background are complex. Everything can change on the fly, even plans that take thousands of years instead of thirty minutes. Stop trying to cadge us into tipping into your plans. And I'm not worshiping any flashy windchimes today, thank-you very much!

-About Worgen: Someone call Nesingwary, I think we've got the next big hunt on our hands. I can't believe the Dead-heads didn't call some of us in to blow down the walls in the first place.

- About Genn Graymane: I know of that Man. I remember his name. There's so few of the old war-horses left from the Big One that avoided getting what they deserved. Of Humans in those times, he definitely has it coming. The ol' wolf of Gilneas is a notch on my gun that I missed out on. To hear told, looks like I might get some furry gun-cozy, too.

Edited by Zeeky H-Bomb

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Sikta was abruptly woken by the interviewer prodding her from the side of the hammock "eh whats that? OH! Zeeky?" She looks contemplative for a moment "Strange goblin, oddly protective of his friends and allies, not that I'm complaining someone willing too die for me is just fine by me..." She seems to think for a moment "seems a bit opinionated for me, humans ain't that bad, least not any worse then anyone else." She seems to cringe as if remembering something painful "That robot of his though..... I swear the thing is mental, coulda sworn I heard it singing something about the doom of the world and whatnot"

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Well, ol' habits die harder than I do. (flicks his cigar ashes with a grin). On the streets, you and yours gottah bring home the bacon. Iff'n you have a no-luck day, a brothah's luck puts dinner on the floor. That kindah mutual thinkin' helped cover my ass in the war. Ain't it nice bein' protected?

As for the Human-folk, some things just can't be unseen, knowwhatImean? YOU might not've seen them for what they've been doin', but I've been out there - seen them for years on the front lines. I've seen 'em do some downright chilly, wicked shit in the name of their so-called 'Light' or in the name of this, or in the name of that. Kingdom. Country. Whatevah. Underhanded n' dishonorable as all getout, n' hypocrites to boot! Ever' human I've run into since wants to tuck me in with a shovel, 'n the feelin's mutual. Suuuure, they might talk a lot about wantin' peace and trade and understanding... and they talk a LOT. Oh how they TALK. I think Humans jus' like to hear themselves talk. Fact is you can't trust a word they say when they do. 's all bullshit, 'fren. Makin' a deal with one will come back to bitechah - trust ol' Zeek on that one. Not an ounce of credit to 'em. Jus' look at the temper tantrums their King throws when he doesn't get his way. If the Humans got the stuffin' knocked out of 'em, the Blueside would buckle and we'd have our first real chance at a lastin' peace. Until they get that attitude adjustment, peace ain't gonnah happen. 'sides, most of their 'allies' in the Blueside would probably deal with their own home issues if the Humans didn't keep dragging them into the fray. Even those purple-skinned Elves might be a tad bit more open to negotations without the Humans talkin' bullshit in their pointy ears. I don' expect you to agree with me. Jus' trust the word of an ol' Gob who's been around n' seen a thing or two.

As for my GUR, 'e just does that. The singin', I mean. Donn' know what's gotten into 'em and once he goes on that, you jus' can't stop 'em. Or when 'e dances. Heck of a sight when 'e does. Claims to see somethings called 'Leper-khans' an' runs off like a murloc chasin' a fat crab. Lately, though, e's been putting on a turkey costume and going 'shhhhsh', creepin' around real slow-like. I donn' know what 'ees up to, but I think Pilgrims' fest is going to be interestin' with him around. Watch your turkeys close, 'e might've been there all along.

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"Zeeky Hefty-Bomb. Haven't met the guy yet, but I hear he's actually doing great things for the goblin refugees, unlike a certain asshat trade prince. If he ever needs my team, he'll get 'em; at a very generous discount."

Edited by Crushem

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"It's rare to find a Gob as willing to give as he is. I'm not sure if that makes him special or crazy. He quite happily handed over me some rare fireworks and a cigar - I only felt it right to return the favor by handing over a polearm I'd happened upon, to give to one of his people at KORE. I cannot help but get the feeling that perhaps he's like this 'cause of what he saw or did during the wars. Hell, I know it made me want to give back."

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Looking out over the ocean as close to Kezan as he can guess, Rezznik takes in a deep breath and tosses a throwing knife into the ground. He answers the reporter without ever looking away from the setting sun.

"Zeek. What a guy. Not only is he a veteran, but he's willing to do what it takes ta see us adjust to new world. I never served with him directly but I heard loads 'bout his ability to get the bombs home. Met him by complete accident in Ashenvale an' he's been a great friend evah since. I'd follow him anywhere. Ain't too many of us Second War vets left to keep the dream alive. Ya know what I'm sayin'?"

Rezznik sighs, troubled suddenly by memories of the old war. With a weary face, he turns to eager journalist and simply quips,

"I think that's all I want to say for now."

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