If you were a Raid Boss...

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What would your encounter be?

Normal Mode

Leyu'jin of the Grim

Protection Warrior

Standard Abilities:

Shockwave: AoE Frontal Cone and Stun for 13 - 15K physical damage.

Spell Reflect: One second casting time (uninterruptable). Can be cast while moving. Will reflect back all spells for 100% additional damage for five seconds. Cast randomly every 25 - 45 seconds.

Reckless Shield Slam: Every 30 seconds, will charge a random non-plate wearer and concussion blow. Will then begin casting a 3 second shield slam (uninterruptable), which will instagib any non-tank. Leyu'jin may not be taunted at this time, and this ability may only be absorbed by a Blessing of Protection (Ihateyoupaladins) or an Intervene (Protection Warriors Forevah!).

At 30% health, will Shieldwall for 60% less damage, and berserk. This increases Leyu'jin's damage by 50%, make him immune to taunt, and he will charge every 10 seconds at a random player. However, during the duration of this berserk, he will be susceptible to all forms of CC and movement impairing effects (subject to diminishing returns). The charge will break all of these effects. During this stage, Leyu'jin will not cast Reckless Shield Slam.

If not killed in 5 minutes, will cast Last Stand and Enraged Regeneration, returning Leyu'jin to full health.

If a paladin casts Divine Shield, Leyu'jin will /cry, which will stun him for 5 seconds and increase damage done to him by 100%.

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Yatokth, da Bawss


- FUCK PVE - Instantly teleports your entire raid into five (two if on 10 man) seperate 5v5 teams in a rated arena match at an MMR of 2K. If every team wins, you get loot.

Hard mode makes it bump you to 2.5K MMR. :D

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Yatokth, da Bawss


- FUCK PVE - Instantly teleports your entire raid into five (two if on 10 man) seperate 5v5 teams in a rated arena match at an MMR of 2K. If every team wins, you get loot.

Hard mode makes it bump you to 2.5K MMR. :D


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Elemental Shaman

Standard Abilities:

I'm A Fuckin' Shaman - The moment you enter, you are handed gear. Because 25 or 10 v 1 is balanced, yo.

THEY CAME FROM... THE NEST - If you don't leave in 5 minutes, a raid of Raven Cross members appear, kill everybody, get bored, and then attack Stormwind. GG.

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Not a raid boss.

But a propossed raid instance.. (I STARTED WRITING THIS BEFORE DIO'S POST)


Description: The very heart of the Raven Cross. You must battle your way before the trials to the very bowels of... THE NEST... To prove superiority over their numbers.

The Ring of Initiation (One Encounter)

Gauntlet of every Raven who has not earned their colors. Gear check encounter. Once completed, the Patriarch makes a speach entrailing the various creeds of the Cross. This speach lasts appx. 15 minutes. Any in the encounter who afk / log / dc / minimize their screen are ejected from the instance permanently until reset.

Dynastus Quarters:

Dej Dynastus, the Elven family of high renown, has an uncanny representation within the Raven Cross. The might of this broken family must be matched before one can journey further into... THE NEST


Izelle the Playful

Calestra the Lover

Sabeinne the Condenscending

Lysimachus the Brave

The Bitch Sect:

This group of bearers are known far and wide for the strength of their tongues. Can you face the might of their venomous words and overall unpleasant demeanor?


Apothecary Vaaldis the Catty

Carrowyn the Cold-Hearted

Miss High Bitch Labufonda of the Acid Tongue

Fuck Man I Can't Do It Shit Place:

The bearers here possess the drive to become powerful in their own, but their skills, though great, cannot compare to the might of the bosses. They are still however in the way, and must be beaten.

Periettel the Polite and Considerate

Arokai who is so dumb he don't make no sense.

Serenity the Curious

Yuseggarr "The Wolf" O'Riley

Cyrass the Completely Unstoppable for 45 seconds out of every 3 minutes.

The Boss Zone:

This is it. The last of the last. Are you up to the challenge?

Bossette Szordrin the Emaculate

Boss Anorah the Badass / Thelsuo the Incredibly Hard to Place

The Triad (continued from The Boss Zone. One Encounter)

Arokai appears before you in a cowboy outfit: "RAWLCAWL"

1. Boss Diomades the brains of the Group if you got a problem he can solve it for you.

2. Patriarch Leoren here who loves a good sandwich so if you have a sandwich come roll with him

3. Boss Yatoth motherfucker the sensitive one break your motherfuckin' face with the butt of his gun rip off your arms and break your legs with 'em spread your ass cheeks and stick his dick in 'em

Oh wait...

Chikt appears from nowhere! This is the mastermind of everything the Raven Cross has been doing.. Financially. Can you face him?


Tax Evasion: Chikt can evade taxes, so therefore he can evade your attacks too! Cast every 45 seconds: Causes 15 second immunity to all damage.

Brain: Chikt is actually smart. Therefore all threat is dropped and Chikt targets the top healer for 10 seconds and is untauntable for the duration. Cast randomly every minute.

Unworthy: Chikt deems you unworthy for the Raven Cross, every 5 minutes he tears up a random raid member's (non-tank, non-healer) application and ejects them from the instance for the duration of the fight. 3 second cast time, uninterruptable.

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I still want to know who came up with "the nest"

You can pretty much blame most weird things that Raven Cross does on either me or Yatokth or a combination of the two.

I am the creator, and he is the deliverer.

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It's actually full of win and the dolls of small alliance children that we trample.

I collect them. Mementos of all the tiny squishy babies I've stepped on over the years.

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Keldorin Emberlight

NOT a Retribution Paladin

Keldorin begins the fight mounted on a Mechano-Hog.

During this phase he has three abilities:

Keldorin has a cleave effect so melee combatants will have to stay behind him while mounted.


Every 15 to 25 seconds Keldorin will cast a spell that creates a small smoke cloud. This smoke cloud will deal 1750 damage every second to anyone standing in it, anyone who stands in the smoke cloud for more than 6 seconds will gain a debuff called "Lost in the Cloud" which will have the same effect as blind making the player wander aimlessly for six seconds.

Bucket of Paint:

Keldorin will randomly throw a bucket of paint at any raid member in the raid. This paint will put a 2 second debuff on the player hit by it. If this ability is not despelled within the three seconds the player hit by it will gain the debuff called "Covered in paint" causing the player to become stuck in a rather gooey layer of paint. To break this character free of his painty shell 40000 damage must be applied to the "Painty Shell"

Once Keldorin's Mechano-Hog has been dealt with, it will break apart underneath him taking the fight into Phase two.

Abilities in Phase Two:

Keldorin will continue to cleave during this portion of the fight.

Mana Explosion:

Keldorin will channel this spell for six seconds dealing an area of effect blast around him that will instantly kill anyone within the blast radius. He will use this ability every 45 seconds.

Gallon of Paint:

A shadow will appear underneath a large portion of paint. Anyone hit by the initial damage from the falling paint will take 10,000 damage as well as gain the "Painty Shell" debuff from the first phase.

Dance party:

Keldorin will randomly shout "Dance Time" every 45 to 60 seconds. During this time players have 4 seconds to type /dance or they will be targeted by Keldorin and blasted with a force of mana dealing 11,000 damage as well as placing a debuff on the target called "You are no fun" which will deal another 10,000 damage over 8 seconds.


Keldorin will randomly target a member of the raid and focus a targeted arrow over them. He will quickly 'sculpt' that character and a copy of that player's class will appear beside Keldorin to aid him. This sculpture of <player's name> will come in to the fight with 140,000 life and will attack the raid or heal Keldorin, this add will need to be dealt with.

(New ability added 10/9/09)


A thick black line across the ground extends out in a random direction from Keldorin's position at which point Keldorin begin's channeling an 8 second cast called Erase. At this time all people in the raid must stack on top of the thick black line or suffer 40,000 magical damage. After this damage the black line will disappear. This ability is not on a timer and can happen at any point during the raid, but not within 30 seconds of itself.

Do Better Next Time:

After three minutes if Keldorin has not been defeated, an NPC named "Slaid" will ride into the area with a new Mechano Hog that Keldorin will mount restarting the first phase. The Mechano-Hog will have the same amount of life as the first one, but keldorin's life will remain the same.

Keldorin has no Enrage Timer.

When Keldorin is defeated he bows graciously accepting defeat and offers up a chest of loot before spinning away eloquently.

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- Basic Prot warrior abilities.

- Tenacious lil bastard, aint he?: A passive effect that cannot be dispelled. Rethius will revive to half of his maximum HP within 2 minutes of being slain.

During the ecounter there is a 30% chance Rethius will spawn a random add: Usually a hunter, ret paladin, or deathknight.

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Ivan Zephyr

<Arch Warlock>


Ivan is similar to the Shade of Aran in that he only casts spells, however he can be taunted and aggro should be gained on him.


Shadowbolt - his primary spam ability.

Shadowbolt Volley - an AoE that hits everyone every 30 seconds

Immolation - Every 45 seconds, Ivan will Immolate 5 (on 25 man) or 2 (on 10 man) players, dealing fire damage over time.

Conflagration - Six seconds after Immolation, Ivan will cast Conflagration on the targets afflicted with Immolation. Targets explode, doing moderate fire damage to themselves and severe fire damage to those within 10 yards of the target.

Howl of Terror - Every minute Ivan will fear the entire raid for 2 seconds.

Shadowfury - Only in phase 3. Every 60 seconds, Ivan will Shadowfury, dealing moderate shadow damage and stunning 3 (in 10 man) or 8 (in 25 man) targets for 5 seconds. Applies the Weakened Soul debuff.

Shadowburn - Only usable on targets with the Weakened Soul targets. Ivan will begin casting Shadowburn, channeling at 10 second spell that instantly kills the targets. To get rid of Weakened Soul, the targets must be healed a certain amount (Think Jaraxxus).


Summon Demon Menagerie - Ivan rises into the air, out of range, and summons his five demons; Pipjub the Imp, Thulmoth the Voidwalker, Vilola the Succubus, Rhuudhon the Felhunter, and Jhuutom the Felguard to attack the raid. Each demon will have it's own health pool. Thulmoth will have the most, followed by Jhuutom, Rhuudhon, Vilola, and then Pipjub.

Demons Abilities:


Blood Pact - For as long as Pipjub is alive, the Demon Menagerie will have twice the amount of health.

Fireball - The only attack Pipjub does, dealing weak fire damage.


Sacrifice - Every 30 seconds, Thulmoth will shield the entire Demon Menagerie, absorbing a moderate amount of damage. This will be used in conjunction with Consume Shadows

Consume Shadows - After Sacrifice, Thulmoth will cast a 10 second heal that, if allowed to succeed, heals the Demon Menagerie to full. Shield must be broken and heal interrupted.


Deadly Seduction - Every 30 seconds; Vilola renders 1 (in 10 man) or 2 (in 25 man) players incapacitated for 15 seconds, placing a DoT on them doing moderate damage while incapacitated. The stun is not dispellable. Will not be cast on a tank.


Mana Explosion - Every 30 seconds, Rhuudhon will mana burn 5 (in 25 man) or 2 (in 10 man) raid members, consuming 5000 mana and dealing 10000 Arcane damage.


Shadow Cleave - Jhuutom will shadow Cleave every 30 seconds, hitting the tank and 1 (in 10 man) or 4 (in 25 man) other players, dealing massive shadow damage to the primary target, and moderate damage to the secondary targets.

Jhuutom will hit extremely hard.


Summon Doomguard: At 35% health, Ivan will summon his doomguard to attack the raid in tandem with it's master. The doomguard will have approximately as much health as Ivan does at 35%


War stomp - Every 30 seconds, the Doomguard will stun everyone within 15 yards for 3 seconds.

Rain of Fire - 30 seconds after being summoned, until killed, the Doomguard will use Rain of Fire. The spell will coat ~35-40% of the room, doing moderate fire damage if caught. Rotates around the room.

Banish - Every minute alive, the Doomguard will banish 1 (in 10 man) or 2 (in 25 man) target(s) for 30 seconds, removing them from combat completely. Cast time 5 seconds. Banished targets will be broken if hit with Rain of Fire.


Phase 1:

Ivan uses all of his abilities until 50%

Phase 2:

At 50% Ivan rises into the air and out of range, summoning his menagerie of demons. During this phase, Ivan will only Shadowbolt Volley every 30 seconds.

Phase 3:

When the Demon menagerie is destroyed, Ivan lands and re-engages the raid, using all of his abilities, as well as Shadowfury and Shadowburn. His AoE fear will only be cast AFTER Shadowfury.

Phase 4: "At 35% Ivan will summon a Doomguard, attacking the raid with it's master.

Ivan has a 15 minute enrage timer. Upon enraging, Ivan gains a new ability.

Soul Siphon - Steals the souls of the target, doing 100k instant shadow damage. He'll use this on each target in rapid succession. Once Soul Siphon begins, the raid has about 15 seconds (30 on 25-man) before everyone dies.



Engaged: "Stare into the abyss...let me show you the futility of your plight..."

Howl of Terror: "Know true fear."

Phase 2: "How interesting...You've proven more capable than I anticipated. Lets see how you fair against my servants...

End of phase 3: "You've outlived your welcome; your annoyances shall be punished!"

Phase 4: [Demonic]: "Kara'zhet Zerok! Your souls will forever haunt this hall!"

Enraged: "Enough! Your souls belong to me now!"

Death: "I...must have...underestimated..."



Size isn't everything! - During the Ivan Zephyr encounter, destroy Pipjub the Imp last.

Doomguard Shmoomguard - During the Ivan Zephyr encounter, defeat Ivan while his Doomguard is alive.

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Alacardia Arianray

Arcane Mage, Enchanter

Encounter begins when Frostmourne drops from Arthas. Seeking to destroy the cursed blade the mage turns on the party


Start: This is it, our chance. Give me the blade, let me destroy it. We can begin to end this horror now!

Agro: You need for useless trinkets means more then the destruction of the entire world?!

Arcane Explosion: Can you survive..

Arianray: Let me show you what a life time of study can accomplish.

Phaze Two: Flesh only hinders you in the end.

Mirror Images/Invisibility: Persistence will be your undoing.

Raid Whipe:'Alacardia disenchants frostmourne. Turning his attention back to the raid and asking if anyone would like to roll for the shard.'

Raid successfull: How...unfortunate.

Arcane Blast: Standard ability, casts it on the tank at regular intervals. Dealing 12K damage Cannot be broken. Stacks five times increasing arcane damage by 200%. 3 second cast time. Debuff can be dispelled.

Arcane Explosion: Standard AoE dealing 10k damage in a five foot radius blowing all effected targets back by thirty yards. Caused a debuff called Arcane reside that ticks for 1k Damage every second for ten seconds (Can be dispelled.)

Arcane Barrage: Begins to cackle madly. randomly casts Arcane missles at a random target. 2 second channel spell that deals 15k to selected individual

Slow: Casts slow on the highest threat generating target. Working his way down until Arcane explosion is cast. Reduced run speed by 50 percent.

Arianray: Absorbs the residual mana from the room as well as absorbing 1k mana from every possible raid member. Absorbs any arcane residue buffs that may remain. Randomly targets a player (except the tank) Sending the mana in a large beam to the target dealing a death blow. Can not be avoided, can not be helped.

Mirror image: At about 50% Alacardia spawns four replicas. with around 100k hit points each (10 man version) Each mirror image is capable of dealing the same amount of damage as alacar, can use all his same abilities.

Invisibility: When Mirror images appear the arcanist disappears. Allowing a momentary respite of sorts as his images do the work for him. Can be pulled out of invisibility but who really wants to deal with five enemies at this time. Take the time to deal with the images before he returns.

Phaze two: Alacardia sheds his physical form. Taking on the form of a wraith and continuously casting arcane explosion. Drops agro and randomly targets players hitting them with arcane missles. All magical damage done to alacardia is increased by 50%. While all physical damage is decreased by 50% Once defeated he sends a final AoE blast killing anyone within melee range.

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The Hell Did I Ever Do To Any Of You? - Rethsil isn't stupid enough to make 10 or 25 raid members mad enough to kill him for loot. He'll proceed to tell them, "Get out of my presence!" And every member is kicked out the instance. Uninterruptible.

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Lady Ansha Saeralyan


Ice Barrier - absorbs a percentage of her health in damage before shattering, freezing all targets within 40 yards; has a 30 second cooldown

As the Frost - passive aura that reduces incoming damage from all sources by 15%; incoming fire and frostfire damage increased by 20%

Arcane Barrage - deals arcane damage to target and anyone within 5 yards

Ice Lance Volley - deals frost damage to all members of the raid within 40 yards

Mass Slow - all targets within the raid are slowed for 30 seconds, nondispellable; reduces movement, melee and ranged attack speeds by 50%

Mirror Image - Calls forth four images of herself that aggro independently and fire arcane barrages at random

You Wouldn't Hit a Girl Wearing Glasses, Would You? - Periodically asks this question of the raid, stunning everyone (undispellable) for 6 seconds

Bibliomania - Whenever a book is thrown on the ground nearby, Ansha drops everything and spends 20 seconds reading the book; during this time she gains the debuff Preoccupied, which results in a 100% vulnerability to all forms of damage


Phase 1

Upon aggro, Ansha casts Mass Slow and attempts to run away from melee, firing Ice Lance Volleys every 4-6 seconds. She should be tanked by a warlock or fire/frostfire mage. At 80%, 50% and 30% she casts Mirror Image. Every 20-40 seconds, she yells, "You wouldn't hit a girl with glasses, would you?" and stuns the raid for 6 seconds. During this time, she runs farther from melee and continues to Ice Lance Volley and Arcane Barrage.

Phase 2

After three minutes, one of the bookshelves in the room will be struck by a stray Ice Lance during one of her volleys, knocking a book onto the floor. Someone should pick up the book and throw it near her feet. This gives her the debuff Preoccupied as she goes over to the book and kneels to read it. Attack her in earnest during this time.

She switches between Phases 1 and 2 throughout the fight. Repeat until she reaches 0%.

Rather than die when she reaches 0 hp, she is encased in a permanent Ice Block. As she Ice Blocks, she yells, "This is merely a setback!"

30 seconds after she Ice Blocks, the Ice Block fades and she yells, "I return! Another chance to carve your skulls INTO BOOKENDS!"

The fight starts over at phase 1 at this point, with her restored to maximum health.

This repeats ad infinitum. Opening a GM ticket gets the reply, "We are aware of this issue and will be looking at fixing it in a future patch."

Obviously, she has no loot table, because she doesn't die. She just ice blocks.

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Geofforan the Childish has loot and must be raided for it! Enter his Wonka-esque lair and do battle with him and his army of toys!

Trash pulls are Geofforan showing off toys to the raid as he retreats to the boss room.

Phase 1: 100%

Fight starts as normal, tank and spank.

Phase 2: 75%

"I have an idea!"

Geofforan rushes into the center of the room and kicks everyone to the walls, like in the Icehowl encounter. He then chooses one person to make "it" and begins to run around the room, charging random raid members. The person who is "it" gets a speed boost and has to melee Geofforan so that he stops running around. While he is playing tag, he can't be hurt by anyone other than "it." This happens in intervals until the next phase.

Phase 3: 50%

"Okay, you won! Now for something else!"

Geofforan throws a ball at a random raid member, giving them a debuff that makes them explode after a few seconds. While holding the ball, the raid member can't use any abilities. Passing another raid member gives him or her the debuff and removes it from you, replacing it with a debuff that prevents you from holding the ball again. After the whole raid has had the ball, all the debuffs are removed and Geofforan takes the ball back, letting it explode in his hands, dealing a good bit of damage to him. This repeats until the next phase.

Phase 4: 25%

Geofforan goes into a soft enrage ("Competitive Spirit") and alternates between the two games until the end of the encounter.

End of Encounter: 1%

Geofforan stops attacking and becomes a friendly target, rushing off to get a loot chest for the raid.


Aggro: "I'm out of toys, but I know some games we can play!"

Tag: "Tag, you're it! Hahaha...!"

Pass the Ball: "Look alive!"

End of Encounter: "That was the most fun I've had in ages! Take some of these, you earned them."

Player Death: "You won't win like THAT!"

Player Death: "You're out!"

Player Death: "You lost the game!"

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Alphaeus Streamside

The 'Other' Good Doctor

Upon engaging, Alphaeus gives a snappy but somewhat over-done and too-long speech about worlds of black and white and seeing in gray.

Phase 1:

He will tab double-dot the whole raid, then run around with no aggro table spamming Holy Nova like an idiot.

At 50% health, he'll Disperse and give another lame speech about a stark world. He will then enter Phase 2.

Phase 2:

He will desperately cast healing spells on himself and send a shadow fiend out on some poor SOB.

Upon death, he'll steal a line from one of Kiyo's characters about how the brightest lights cast the darkest shadows. His body will immediately re-disperse and vanish.

His loot table kind of sucks.

However he will be featured in 3 more raid instances and a 5 man after this initial appearance.

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